Update

Since my June 14 treatment.....I returned to work on Wednesday June 16 feeling pretty good...tired, but good.

We spent the next weekend at the lake cleaning up and getting ready for "Girls Weekend" on June 25-27...I've never had one so I'm looking very much forward to hanging out with two great friends this weekend....no boys allowed!


I must have over done it on Sunday because I couldn't stay at work on Monday. I arrived feeling tired, but okay. As the day wore on I realized that I needed to go home and rest. I was pretty much just sitting in my office staring at my computer screen and unable to concentrate on work at all. So I went home to my couch where I tried to rest. I told Paul that I didn't want any distractions unless it was him coming home from work. I had three knocks on my door!! Oh well, two of them were good to have. First we had a registered letter that I needed to sign for....this knock I could have done without as I had just fallen asleep and woke with a start. The second knock was our good friend Sherwin. It was very nice to see him...thanks for stopping by Sherwin, sorry I wasn't more social! The third knock was UPS, this knock I was very excited about!


A couple of weeks ago I decided that I would try a wig again....I just really miss having hair. I know what your thinking! The last one was a pain in the butt, a new one will be too! And especially ordering it on-line. Not true!


Before ordering I checked the return policy to make sure that if I didn't like it I could return it and get my money back. They did have a return policy so I placed my order.


My new wig arrived via UPS on Monday June 21. I immediately tore open the package and tried it on. It didn't look exactly like the picture below, but it was very similar and in the right colour....very dark brown like my natural colour.

http://www.headcovers.com/693/power-by-raquel-welch-wigs/
From the Raquel Welch collection! If she's put her name on it, it must be good!! If you can't see the picture click on the link above.


Here's how it looks on me.....














Pretty cool eh?!?


For a comparison....here's the other one I don't like any more....















Not so hot!!


The new one is actually comfortable enough to wear a full day! It does not move or shift and the "hair" doesn't fall in my face because it's short. And the best part is that because I also bought the gel cushion head band to wear underneath, it's not itchy! The wig does not sit on my skin it sits on the head band. The band also keeps the wig from being too hot!


Here's the head band....

It looks funny but it's totally worth it!

There was only one thing that I had to get past....the wig "smell"! I was successful at this too! I went to a wig store that specializes in all things wig/extensions and found a "wig spray" that doesn't smell bad....hallelujah!

I arrived at work on Tuesday morning sporting the wig....I was VERY happy with the reaction of my co-workers!

After work I had a few stops to make on my way home. One stop was at the grocery store to pick up a few things. At the deli counter the woman serving me said "I just have to tell you that I love your hair cut!" I was floored! I'm sure that there was an expression of shock pasted on my face. I thanked her, then I felt compelled to tell her that it was a wig, but I very much appreciated her comment. It must look good if complete strangers can't tell it's a wig!

Thank you Raquel!!

Eviction Notice #3

Monday June 14, 2010 - Eviction Notice #3

We arrived at the Cancer clinic for my 9:00 am Chemo appointment to find our new friends waiting in the waiting room for their Chemo appointments. Michelle, Carrie and Debbie where all there to undergo their last chemo treatment! We were all seated in the "sunny side" of the room all in a row. We were able to sit and chat as we all got our different treatments. It is so unbeleivable how so many women can be diagnosed with "Breast Cancer" but how all of our treatments are so very different! I was only in the chair for just over an hour, but I'm still early in my treatment. Michelle was in for just a little while longer so we waited to see her ring the bell! What a fantastic moment that was for her! Again, I can't wait to be ringing that bell for myself! I think Debbie would have been the next one out an hour after Michelle she had 2 drugs to take in, then Carrie said that she would be in the chair for 6 hours that day! What a trooper!! I don't think that any of my treatments will be that long, I can't imagine sitting in that chair (even though it is very comfortable) for that long!

After treatment I went home to rest! Paul was home for lunch and then off to make more sales calls! I spent the next 2 days either on the couch or in bed. At first it was because I felt a little nauseaus (my kick ass drugs took care of that in a hurry) but then I was just very very tired and couldn't seem to keep my eyes open. I was worried on Tuesday that because I had slept for most of the day that I wouldn't sleep at all Tuesday night....making Wednesday a very long day! Well as it turned out, I slept through the night and woke up completely refreshed Wednesday morning....at 4:30 am to my alarm clock that told me it was 6:30 am!! Apparently when I went to bed on Tuesday night I tried to set my alarm but in the process I changed the time on my clock to two hours ahead! When I tried to get up at 4:30 thinking it was 6:30 Paul rolled over and asked "what are you doing?" I replied "I'm getting up to get ready for work"....Paul looked at the clock on his side and said "at 4:30?!?" It was then that I realized that I must have messed up my clock the night before. I went back to sleep to wake up two hours later...no so refreshed this time!

Oh well, I still got up and got ready for work...it was great to be back in the office and not spaced out on the couch!

Now the next 2 and a half weeks will be spent working and getting as much in place as I can for phase 2 because we just don't know how I'm going to feel. I hope to be able to do at least 3 days a week at work but we'll see when the time comes.

"I couldn't do it"

One thing that I've heard a lot lately is people telling me "I couldn't do it" if they were faced with a Cancer diagnosis. I was also of the same mind just a few short months ago. Before my diagnosis I actually tried to imagine what it would be like, how I would react, how I would tell my family....it seemed like the hardest thing have to endure.



The truth of the matter is, is that it is just something that happens and once you have taken the time to process the information it becomes somewhat "easier". Don't get me wrong, it's hard but you learn to deal with it and eventually you start to be able to sleep at night again. You come to realize what's important and what's not. You learn to live for today and stop putting things off for tomorrow. Essentially you learn what it is you want out of life and what you don't!

I pray that none of you have to go through this but if you do just remember that there is some good to take from it. There is no need to only see the bad side, because if that's all you see then God help you to get through it at all! There are positives in everything, even in Cancer.

You can't measure it if you can't find it!

Today was bloodwork and measurement day!


We arrived early....even earlier than some of the doctors and nurses! I went to check in at Clinic 2 but found that they were not open and I was directed to Clinic 1. There I was told that they didn't have my chart but they checked me in anyway and they would have my information for blood work "soon". So we headed downstairs to the Tim Horton's outlet....what a wonderful thing it is to have a Timmy's right there!! After a quick bite we headed back upstairs to wait for my blood work information. Once I had that in hand we headed over to the blood work clinic (all of these clinics are on the main floor at the Cancer Clinic).


Bloodwork took all of five minutes, then we were off to wait for my appointment for measurements.


While we waited we chatted with our new friend Michelle. She was diagnosed in November with Breast Cancer. She is a teacher and opted to take sick leave so as not to upset or disrupt her students. On Monday Michelle will have her last Chemo treatment, which means she gets to ring the bell. When the bell rings it is quite an emotional moment and I can't wait to ring that bell myself in late August but will be very happy to hear Michelle ring it on Monday as we'll both be in for treatment at the same time.


We didn't have long to chat with Michelle as my pager started buzzing to let me know that they were ready for me.


I got weighed as I do every time I go for a "check up" and found (which I already knew) that I've lost some weight....ah, the Chemo diet! I'm down 10 poinds!


The nurse took us to the exam room and asked all of the same questions about side effects and changes, whether I've had a fever or mouth sores and what not and I answered....no changes or side effects (other than my lack of hair), or any problems at all. My blood pressure and temperature were normal.


Then we waited again for a doctor to come and measure Ted to find out how much he and Emily have shrunk.


I have been monitoring thier size every couple of days and I knew that there were some serious differences between the last measurement and todays.


A doctor came in, I didn't catch his name but he was very nice.....he had a student with him, he was also very nice. And I then became very aware that I was the only woman in the room and the only one who would be half naked very soon! I could tell by the look on Paul's face that he wasn't overly comforatble about it either. BUT, they are doctors...this is what they do.


There was no gown to change in to....this struck us as a little weird, normally the nurse would leave one for me but today I didn't have the same nurse (Chantal) as usual.


The doctor asked me to sit on the examination table so I did, I made no effort to remove my shirt....why would I do that without being asked to?!?


He lifted my arms one at a time to feel for swollen lymph nodes in my arm pits....he didn't find any!


Then he finally asked me to remove my t-shirt, I did....but he didn't ask me to remove my bra so I sat there in my bra and tank top and he reached in and felt around. So weird! Then he asked if I thought the tumour had changed....my reply "hell yeah it has!" He chuckled and asked me to point out where it was, I did. He agreed that that's where he felt something too.


There was no measuring tape, no external measurements.....so Paul asked "aren't you going to measure it?" The Doctors response was that the "mass is too small to measure, all I can feel is a thickening"....what a "thickening" is we're still not sure but we do know that it's not the tumour and it nothing of any concern! So Ted is in there he's just realy small! And if Emily is there, she's even smaller!

If you want an idea of how big Ted was before my first treatment.....make a fist....yeah, that's how big he was! So you can just imagine how excited we were with today's news!

This week I also got 5 new tattoos! Wednesday was my "planning" appointment for Radiation. I layed on a table and was pushed through a machine with lasers pointed at me from the ceiling...then I was marked with "x's" where I was to be tattooed. I thought that there would be a tattoo gun like a normal tattoo...nope! The technician wiped the ink on the "x's" then stuck me with a needle in the 5 spots the last one of which was the most painful! Right on the sternum! OUCH!! She said "I save that one for last because it can be painful"....my response "that's good because if you'd done it first I wouldn't have let you touch me again!"

Next Steps:
June 30/10 - Another biopsy! Yeah, more poking and proding!
July 2/10 - A "Sista Mibi"....that's the test that takes 45 minutes twice with a 2 hour break in between. I lay on my stomach with the girls hanging in a hole and a camera goes around me repeatedley.
July 5/10 - Another ECG.
July6/10 - The first round of Phase 2 Chemo and my first Radiation!

Just for fun!

One evening a little while ago Paul sensed that I was not having a very good day....nothing cancer related, just stuff. I was busy cooking dinner and didn't notice that Paul had come in to the kitchen.....wearing my wig!!! I couldn't help but laugh!



Don't you think it suits him?!?


And for some more fun here are some pictures with a couple other follicley challenged friends!



With our friend Jeff.



With my big brother Steve....can you see the resemblance?



With Stephie again.




And if I had a mustache I'd look more like him!